


What's left, a Tanabata debate

by lalois



Category: Kanjani8 (Band)
Genre: Awkward Romance, Banter, Best Friends, Bittersweet, Boys Being Boys, Boys In Love, Confessions, Couch Cuddles, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Family Bonding, Family Feels, Introspection, M/M, Memories, One Shot, Slice of Life, Talking, Tanabata, Tenderness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-08
Updated: 2018-07-08
Packaged: 2019-06-07 08:05:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15214733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalois/pseuds/lalois
Summary: A few things I felt like putting together for celebrating Tanabata. It's a bit messy but I hope you'll enjoy it anyway!





	What's left, a Tanabata debate

**Author's Note:**

> this fanfictions uses (abuses actually) RL facts, hinting to Subaru’s departure from the group and the statement about Yasu’s health, but doesn’t explore the “prior events” in details. In particular, what Ohkura says in the fic refers to a long j-web post he wrote about it. You can find a few details about Yasu updates on Tumblr, links are reachable through my LJ/DW account. I recommend reading all of those, they’re especially touching.

When he enters the greenroom, there’s only one person inside, sitting on a sofa, the very same one addressing Ryo with a deathly glare as soon as he walks over.  
  
 _“Everyone’s just fled, just so you know_ ,” Ohkura warns him, gruffly almost.  
 _“I’ll take the risk_ ,” the guitarist replies, as he plops down the couch beside the drummer.   
He takes a furtive look at Ohkura’s right calf muscle.  
  
 _“So?”  
"The massage guy did what he could; he said I should be okay in a couple’ hours if I stop with the rehearsals right now.”  
  
“Good.”  
“Good a damn thing_,” Ohkura hisses through gritted teeth. “ _The manager asked me to go home earlier and rest, since we’re busy with The Music Day live performance later on.”  
“He’s probably right,_” Ryo tells him with a frown.  
“ _Are you making fun of me as well, Ryochan?! I promised him I’d have given my everything to not let him feel any more pain, but I’m just laying on this damn couch with stupid leg cramps that seem unwillingly to fade despite all the efforts, right when I should be out there, having rehearsals and checking on him. But no, he was the first one rushing to me when I accidentally fell down the cart, he was the one looking at me with worried eyes, and he was the one saying that everything’s gonna be okay. Him. When I should have been the one to tell him that everything’s okay, instead. Can’t you see the irony?! I should run for him, and I have stupid cramps instead!  
I hate this, Ryochan. I feel like the worst of failures, honestly, and we’re running out of time already, we’re due to start soon with the tour…_” he trails off, whining.  
  
Ryo listens quietly. He doesn’t mention his own migraine with aura, the worst headache attack he’s had for ages, pounding unstoppable within his brain since Monday, since the message they released all together with regards to Shota’s health.  
He doesn’t mention it, because he can feel it too, the way the anxiousness is taking over them both. And that can’t be helped.  
  
“ _And that’s not just it_ ,” Ohkura goes on. “ _When I arrived this morning, Shochan reminded me it’s Tanabata today, and that we should call for a wish and write a tanzaku* later on._ ”  
Ryo chews his lower lip.  
  
 _“It’s not like I didn’t notice him sighing when he thought nobody would notice, during the day_ ,” the drummer adds. “ _It’s not like I don’t know what his inner desire would be, apart from praying for his own health obviously. But that person chose not to be with us anymore, and it hurts, and there’s damn nothing I can do to change this.  
This is the worst Tanabata ever. It sucks._”  
There’s silence following the drummer’s enraged voice, when he stops talking and the crumpled paper tissue he throws hits the bin in the corner just right.  
  
 _“Are you done with the rants?_ ” Ryo asks.  
“ _I guess so.”  
“Alright. Awesome. So I guess you didn’t make any tanzaku, in the end.”  
_  
Ohkura’s reply arrives through another cold gaze piercing the guitarist.  
“ _My wish cannot be granted either. Not anymore, Ryochan.”  
“Never say never,_” Ryo replies after a while. “ _Someone told us so, at least.”_  
He manages to have Ohkura hide the shadow of a smile in the corner of his lips.  
 _“Fuck, Ryochan. That’s unfair.”  
“Mh, really?_” Ryo plays along with him.  
  
 _“This was supposed to be our very best year,_ ” Ohkura confesses, “ _but I do honestly have yet to understand how things could be… well, worse than this. We’re all doing our best, and most of the time I’m actually looking forward to the future, but some other days it seems like we’re just… faking it. But we’re not. We’re not.”_  
Ryo doesn’t have an answer for that, and apparently the drummer was waiting for that especially.   
  
“ _How did you cope with this ominous struggle, when you were in both groups?_ ” he insists.  
“ _I didn't,_ ” Ryo replies, matter-of-factly.  
“ _But, how-“  
“Didn't you remember how pissed off I was always, around you all?_” Ryo tells him. “ _How many times the senpais scolded me because I seemed to be there, but my mind wasn’t? I honestly hoped that one day everything would come to an end. I was going psycho.”  
  
“Do you mean we’re all going psycho with Shibuyan leaving and Shochan this fragile?”_  
“ _Definitely not. But because we’re in this together, we’ll make it for sure. Eito is my real family, Ohkura, the only place where I do truly feel I belong to. As long as we’re together facing the hardship, we’ll make it. Does it mean we will have to start it from scratch again, after 15 years together? Well, we’ll do that. It’s an incredible opportunity, I reckon, to overcome one more wall.”_  
It’s Ohkura’s turn to listen quietly.  
  
“ _Do you remember what you told me one year ago? If there's a bridge, there's a possibility**_ ,” Ryo reminds him.  
 _“That was about the two of us, though,_ ” Ohkura retorts.  
“ _Don’t ruin everything now, shit_ ,” Ryo whines, but it’s on a mocking tone, and the drummer intercepts it and giggles softly.  
  
 _“What’s left of us, Ryochan?_ ” Ohkura sighs, shifting a bit on the sofa to relax more.  
  
Ryo looks at him, then at the drummer’s left hand resting beside his thigh and before he can think properly about what he’s going to do, the fingers of his right hand are already moving on their own, by instinct, covering carefully Ohkura’s ones and intertwining with them delicately.  
  
The drummer does not refuse the contact, and does not even mutter some kind of protest. He decides to let his hand rotate so that to offer Ryo his palm instead, and their hands are interlaced fully now, Ryo’s thumb rubbing over Ohkura’s slowly but nonstop.  
  
 _"You were amazing. The message you wrote about Shochan, I mean."  
"Look who’s talking. It’s you who were truly amazing, Ryochan.”  
“Want us to have a fight right when I finally managed to tame you? You’re really something, Ohkura_,” Ryo remarks, frowning, much to the drummer’s soft laugh.  
  
“ _Mh. I like your strength, Ryochan, and the way you were finally able to write down your feelings about Shibuyan leaving us… It’s not like I’m not worried for you as well, you know? And since you never, never, never, never want to talk about it openly, it’s not easy at all. So I’m relieved you wrote something this amazing, for us all."_  
Ryo swallows the compliments, furrowing openly.  
  
 _“My turn for confessions, now_?” he asks lightly.  
 _“Go ahead,_ ” the drummer authorizes him.  
  
“ _People says you’re an easy guy and a bitch. They do nothing about you. The way you care about the one who are precious the most to you, the way you worry and you feel like protecting them… you might say it’s no big deal, but it tells a lot about you instead. And I’m so proud of you, for who you are, and not because you put those things into words, but rather because I know how committed you are, both when it comes to people you treasure and about all the tasks you carry out despite your obvious fears of not being ‘enough’.  
Shochan is so lucky, Ohkura. Because I couldn’t be more proud of who he has got to check on him daily.”  
“It’s not-“  
“It is,_” Ryo cuts him off. “ _It’s important. So fuckin’ important.”_  
Ohkura bites his lips, looking down.  
  
" _Hey. Look at me."_  
Ohkura turns, and dark almond eyes meet deep black ones.  
 _"We'll make it. For sure. That's what you also told me."_  
Ohkura nods briefly, pursing his lips.  
  
" _And you know what, Ohkura? I've never been more determined and persuaded of reaching this goal. Like never before. Because of you guys. I've let you lots cuddle me endlessly, pamper me whenever I needed, take the bother to tell me when I was acting like a pain in the ass, letting me become an adult, for real. You, Shochan, Maruchan and our senpais. I owe you all. That’s why I won't let any of you get hurt anymore, if I can. I'll do anything I can to not let you all feel this crushed anymore. I promise, Tatsu."_  
Ohkura says nothing in reply, but his grip in Ryo's hand gets stronger than before, and they can both feel it.  
  
Ryo leans closer, not really sure whether to do it or not.  
Ohkura bends his head slightly towards him, and Ryo moves further, until his nose brushes the drummer's, and he can feel his breath uneven.  
  
He closes his lids, pressing his lips gently on Ohkura's. The kiss is gentle, and not demanding, but when the drummer bends even more and lets his lips being parted open, the make-out becomes a tender, endless caress.  
Ryo's thumb designs slow, delicate circles on Ohkura's knuckle, and he doesn't even dare moving an inch from where he's sitting, beside the drummer. He feels in heaven already, being able to share what's inside his heart this openly, with such display of genuine love and affection.  
  
When they part, the drummer lets his forehead rest lazily pressed against Ryo's, sighing deeply.  
 _"What was I saying before, about Tanabata?_ " Ohkura murmurs on Ryo's lips in a low, mischievous voice filled with unspoken emotion.  
 _"That-"_  
The door bangs open, revealing a wide-eyed Yasu carrying a couple of snacks and Yoko with a few bottles of Pocari Sweat right behind him, freezing as much as the couple who slowly disentangles their fingers and their faces, feigning indifference.  
  
 _"You look like you feel a lot better, Ohkura, I’m glad,_ " Yoko casually says, guiding Yasu to a sofa nearby.  
" _Mh. Apparently,_ " the drummer nods, vaguely unimpressed. He catches Yasu's smirk and adds, " _I wasn’t slacking off. I was just, you know..."  
“I think I remember you mentioning you'd jump for me, right?_” Shota asks.  
  
 _“I… Yeah, of course I will,_ ” Ohkura confirms, nodding.  
“ _Well then, why are you still here instead of going home and rest a bit so that tomorrow we can start with the rehearsals properly again?”  
“But-“  
“Ryochan, you can drive him home, right?”_ Shota asks the guitarist, frowning. “ _And have some rest, as well, before we meet up at Makuhari Messe in Chiba?”  
“But-“  
“I think you did also write something like ‘I'll make sure Shochan does not push himself and get stressed’, right?_" Shota insists.  
 _“Yeah, I-“  
“Then why are you letting me get stressed seeing that Tacchon is not resting properly?”  
_  
“ _Because if we don’t make sure you won’t overdo, who will?_ ” the drummer retorts.  
“ _Thanks for taking Hina and Maru and me into consideration, Ohkura,”_  Yoko intervenes from a corner, while serving himself a coffee.  
 _“Well, I_ -“ Ohkura tries to defend himself, but surrenders once he catches Shota’s deep frown again. “ _Alright, you win, okay?! I’ll go. I’ll go.”_  
He stands up, walking a bit hesitantly to fetch his bag.  
  
 _“I… I’ll go?_ ” Ryo asks again, unsure about the way things are turning out suddenly.  
 _“You go,_ ” Shota nods, and waves his band mates bye when they take their leave from the room with a ‘see you later’.  
  
“ _You’re truly a demon”_ , Yoko says then, sipping his coffee, and Shota winks at him.  
  
Half a minute later, it’s Maru and Shingo opening the door to the greenroom.  
“ _Hey guys… was it Tacchon and Ryochan the one we met in the corridor saying they were about to go home together?”  
“They were,”_ Shota pouts.  
Maru blinks for a long moment.  
  
“ _REALLY?!”  
“Really,_” Shota insists.  
  
“ _YEAAAAAAHH!! Ye-eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-ahhhhhh! Y-E-A-H-H!!”_  He shouts out then, exchanging high five with Shota first, Shingo and Yoko next.  
  
 _“How come, Shochan? How come?!”  
“It's the magic of Tanabata,”_ the petite guy tells him with a proud pout.  
  
 _“It’s Yasuda’s magic, you'd wanna say_ ,” Shingo retorts, patting Shota's shoulder while passing by, and Shota merely giggles.  
 _“I love you,_ ” Maru says then, throwing a huge flying kiss at his band mate.  
“ _I know, and I love it,_ ” Shota replies, with a knowing wink.

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. Tanzaku: a piece of paper you hang on bamboo trees, containing your prayer or wish. It’s normally done during Tanabata on 7th July.  
> 2\. the citation comes from a fanfiction I wrote for Tanabata 2017, "The River between", about these two lines:  
> "Because there's a bridge, I could do it," he slowly tells me, looking straight at me with those captivating black orbs of his. "There's a bridge, so there's a possibility," I reply, playing along with him.   
> 3\. And of course Never say never is a citation to Eito’s song written by Yasu ;)


End file.
